You know, Dean had actually thought he caught a break with the new room being empty. That was, of course, until it suddenly looked like Stull freakin' Cemetery in Lawrence. He could see Sam and Adam--Lucifer and Michael--as they stopped and stared at the arrival of the Impala. When it came to a stop, he watched himself step out, looking almost at ease as he addressed the duo. "Hey. We need to talk."

Wow, he really had balls. Just, you know, an objective observation.

Lucifer shot a glance to his brother before sighing and turning his attention to the other Dean. "Dean," he said in a tone that was gentle in a way at odds with how Sam really spoke. It had, at the time, helped differentiate between the two of them in Dean' head. "Even for you, this is a whole new mountain of stupid."

"I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to Sam," that Dean said.

Dean looked away, watching as Bobby and Castiel arrived without being seen by the pair of freakin' archangels. Too wrapped up in family drama.

"You're no longer the vessel, Dean," Michael said, stepping forward to interrupt. "You got no right to be here."

"Adam, if you're in there somewhere, I am so sorry." Yeah, and there was Cas lighting up that moltov cocktail in the background.

Michael made a bitchface that would have put Sam to shame. "Adam isn't home right now."

"Well, then you're next on my list, buttercup." Wow, had he really been that freakin' flippant about this? "But right now, I need five minutes with him," Dean in the memory said, gesturing toward Sam's body.

Which was the final straw for Michael. "You little maggot. You are no longer a part of this story."

And, thank god for Cas now. "Hey, ass-butt!"

He threw the now flaming bottle of holy oil at Michael, causing him to scream in pain, lighting up like a freakin' bonfire before he disappeared. Yeah, that had not been the smartest plan, but it was all they had at that moment.

"Ass-butt?"

Cas gave a little shrug at the admonishment. "He'll be back. And upset." Understatement, man. "But you got your five minutes."

Which would be when Lucifer reminded them all of his presence. "Castiel," he said with deliberate calm. "Did you just Molotov my brother with holy fire?"

"Uh... no." Cas was the worst liar ever.

Not that it would have stopped Lucifer from getting back at him. "No one dicks with Michael but me," he informed the poor guy, snapping his fingers to cause Cas to explode in a rain of blood and chunks of flesh.

He could see the other him tense up, hands balled into fists as he tried to reach his brother. "Sammy, can you hear me?"

Lucifer turned to him him, grimacing as he stepped closer."You know, I tried to be nice. For Sammy's sake." He grabbed the lapels of Dean's jacket, holding tight. "But you? Are such a pain in my ass," he said, shoving hard enough to send the other Dean flying into the Impala, cracking the windshield on impact.

The only thing stopping Lucifer then was Bobby growing the biggest pair of balls ever and shooting him. And shooting him again. He probably would have taking another shot it Lucifer hadn't snapped his neck with a gesture of his--Sam's hand.

"No!"

Dean looked away, not really up for watching what happened next.

"Yes," Lucifer said, grabbing the memory Dean's leg and yanking him down off the car before punching him hard enough to knock a few teeth loose and leave him rattled.

Memory Dean spit out blood, turning back to face Lucifer. "Sammy? Are you in there?"

"Oh, he's in here, all right." He hauled back and punched the other Dean again. "And he's gonna feel the snap of your bones." And then another punch that caused Dean to fall to the ground. "Every single one." And like he could let the fun end there. Lucifer hauled him back up, something almost like a smiled on his face. "We're gonna take our time."

And then he really went to town on beating the ever living crap out of that Dean.

"Sam, it's okay. It's okay. I'm here. I'm here. I'm not gonna leave you," that Dean said, not even trying to fight back. "I'm not gonna leave you."

[[OPEN SURE. Camp 2 & 3!]]